the in-between

You've hit submit. You've ended the relationship. You've applied for the job. You've done the hard thing.

And now... you wait.

You're in the in-between.

I've been noticing this with many of my clients. Students submitting college applications and waiting for responses—sitting in the space between completing something huge and not knowing what comes next. Their parents, watching their children step toward independence and wondering what life will look like in a few months. A client searching for a new job, feeling one foot in her current role and one foot already somewhere else. 

The in-between can feel uncomfortable. You want to skip ahead to the part where decisions are made and the path is clear. Anxiety creeps in as you ask: Where do I focus now that something big has passed? How do I hold both the anticipation of what’s coming and the exhaustion from what I’ve just navigated? How do I stay present when part of me is already living in the future?

But what if the in-between isn't just empty space?

The Meaning Inside the Pause

The pause between chapters is where integration happens—where the lessons land, the emotions get processed, and you figure out what you're carrying forward. This waiting period is part of the transition, and the rest and recalibration that come from it are important moments for development. 

Here's how to harness the power of that moment:

Acknowledge the completion. You did something big and that deserves recognition. Even if the outcome isn't yet known, the effort was real. Let yourself pause before rushing to the next thing. 

Tend to the aftermath. After something significant, exhaustion, mixed emotions, and leftover tension all need care. Do what supports you–sleep more, spend a whole day doing nothing, revisit a hobby, meet up with a friend, or focus on small wins—like clearing your inbox or tidying a space. These aren't distractions; they're ways of helping your system recover.

Resist the productivity pull. The urge to fill the space—stay busy, distract yourself, jump into the next thing—is natural. But the in-between is asking you to slow down and be here, even when it feels uncomfortable. 

Trust what's forming. When you give yourself space to reflect on who you’ve been and who you’re becoming, you lay the foundation for what comes next. That’s how clarity emerges – not from rushing, but from allowing yourself to sit with the questions. 

The in-between is practice. It’s teaching you how to live with uncertainty—a skill you’ll return to in every major transition ahead.

This week, I invite you to ask yourself: What would it look like to actually inhabit this pause, rather than rush to escape it?