why the right decision may not be the point

Last week, I found myself staring at color samples for a new roof and siding. What seemed like a simple task—pick a shade, send it to the contractor—turned into an unexpected spiral. I consulted friends and asked professionals, but I still felt that anxious tug in my chest: What if I pick the wrong one?

It’s funny how even small decisions can stir up the same feelings we face with the big ones. In my coaching sessions this week, several clients were sitting in those bigger questions: Where should I go to college? Is it time to change careers? Do I move across the country without a safety net? Should we move our aging parents into our home or find independent living?

Each one was wrestling with the same underlying worry: Is this the right decision?

It’s such a vulnerable place to be. The weight of one choice can feel overwhelming. I hear the longing for certainty, for reassurance that the step they take will guarantee success or happiness.

The truth is, some decisions do have lasting consequences. But life isn’t defined by a single choice. It’s a series of decisions, one after another, and along the way we often get the chance to adjust, to choose again, and to learn from the outcomes.

As parents, when our children ask us, “Is this the right decision?” it can stir up our own memories—times we regretted a leap, or wished we’d been braver. It’s tempting to want to protect them from those bumps. But part of living fully is making imperfect choices, learning from them, and discovering that even the “wrong” step still moves us forward.

So if you find yourself asking, what if this isn’t the right decision? try these reminders I share with my clients (and with myself):

• Listen inward. When the noise of outside opinions feels overwhelming, pause and reconnect with your values. Often clarity comes from tuning in, not out

• Trust your resilience. Whatever choice you make, you’ll bring your skills, relationships, and wisdom to what comes next.

• Expect to keep choosing. Life doesn’t hinge on one perfect decision. It’s a rhythm of trying, adjusting, and moving forward.

Living with uncertainty isn’t easy—but it’s part of being human. And it’s often in the uncertainty that we grow the most.

What decision are you holding back because you’re waiting for absolute certainty? And what would change if you gave yourself permission to simply take the next good step?